Sunday, January 13, 2008
12:48 am
hi friend, its getting irksome.you know? the competition and all.can i ask?what makes me such an arrogant bitch that you have t compete w me in order t make yourself feel better?am i not good enough as a friend?have i been nasty t you?or is it plain jealousy on your part?ive tried.tried t think that i was over sensitive.tried t convince myself that it just so happen that you end up in the same place as me,doing the same thing,and having the same sentiments.at first it was nice feeling t have someone whos similar t me in many ways.then it got too much,havent you realise that your life always happen the same way as mine did?and if you were praying that no one would discover, too bad, your stories always come after mine.i dont understand,ive forgiven too many times,trying my best t maintain our friendship.but youve just proven me wrong t have done that.time and again.what is it that you cant say in my face that you have t resort t meaningless things like this?im very sure that ive not done you wrong,at least not before you did t me.ive never treated friends badly in any ways.not in my life.youve just taught me an unforgettable lesson t never be frank t anyone whom we call 'friend'.does the feeling thrills you?t have appear as generous, as happening, as carefree, as happy as i am?cant you just lead your life and leave mine alone?you are just trying too hard.way beyond what you are capable of.dont you ever find it tiring?to check out my friends,my belongings,my plans,my family,my thoughts,my life.?
is it not miserable for you?if you think otherwise, i do feel it for you.its lil things like that,beginning from lil phrases,t our taste for things,t the things we own,even the friends we mix w.and then it is shaping your life like the way mine is.i cant stand it no more.you snatch whats mine before presenting yourself as the next most reliable person.i dont humiliate you like the way you do t me.i dont stoop t your level.just in hope that you realise ive never wanted t take it t heart.never have i not regretted in sharing w you cos youve never proven worthy t be.i do try,t let you in on my thoughts and feelings,but it was betrayal ive always felt.cant you treat me the way you treat your other friends?cant you be true t me?cant you not harbor any form of motives in getting near me?cant you stop these competing?i feel suffocating t be anywhere near you,because you are fake.never genuine in words,things you do is nothing more than a facade.you just drove me t the limit.ive no more patience.if you are feeling guilty,you are the one.
sel poivre et l'eau
